Love/Hate Obsession On Call The Editor

In Defense of Call the Editor

I am one of the regular readers of “Call the Editor” in the local newspapers. I guess I am motivated by a love/hate obsession.

On the love side, I support the freedom that anyone can express their opinion regardless of any knowledge on the subject, omitting any statements of facts about their claims, and get into print cheap shots at just about anyone. I also acknowledge this is the only way some people can get their story into print quickly while the incident is current.

On the hate side, I know just before I turn to that page one or more of the comments will stir up feelings of anger, pity, or disgust, and even the desire to answer with my own call the editor comments (which I have not done yet). I do have a problem with anonymous comments attacking a person by name.

As I get older I have come to the conclusion that most people will judge comments in “Call the Editor” on merit rather than emotion. I do not believe they sway people’s opinion very much either way on any subject. Perhaps their best offering is information on upcoming events and feedback on events that just happened. In any event I support and will continue to read, “Call the Editor”.

My Thoughts On Veteran's Day

Ross Chandler

In a few days we will acknowledge another Veterans Day. This year it is on a Tuesday and it is always on the 11th day of November of every year (a congressional designated holiday). On this day our nation acknowledges the moment when the guns of World War I went silent -- and we recognize the service and the sacrifice of all our nation's veterans. Including those who served at Valley Forge, WWI, WWII, Korea, Vietnam, Kuwait, Kandahar, Baghdad, and many more locations. We should be grateful to the veterans who have fought for our freedom. Freedom is not free; in fact it is very expensive.

Following is the general definition of a veteran: “A military veteran is any person who served for any length of time in any military service branch”. However, the definition of those veterans eligible for veteran benefits or other veteran provisions such as retirement, disability, tax-free status, etc. quickly becomes complicated.

Now come my thoughts on a veteran:

ü A veteran is a person who joined a branch of the military with no clue of what they were getting into. In my case, no one told me that I would be subject to the tough Uniform Code of Military Justice and all the other laws, criminal and civil. No one told me that drill instructors could make your life hell for 90 days or more. No one told me there were places on earth that are both cold and hot as hell (In my case Shemya Island, Alaska and Northern Pakistan).

ü All veterans are underpaid, most are sent to unfamiliar places, lived in spartan conditions, and shoulder awesome responsibility. Some lose limb, sight, legs, or sanity. Some are killed. All are subject to any sacrifice for their country.

ü A veteran must be sound of body and mind to be in the military. In other words you must be physically and mentally fit to be stressed, maimed, or killed in the service of your country.

ü Most veterans also have families who share separation, financial problems, anxiety, and other hardships.

20+ years of military life later, I am proud of being a veteran and the lessons I learned over the years. Because I was in the Air Force, I honestly feel I write better, plan better, work with others better, and shoulder responsibility better than if I had drifted through life without the military experience.

In Defense of Law Enforcement

By Ross Chandler

Most of us have our only encounters with law enforcement through traffic violations. Recently I received a ticket from Highway Patrolman Jay Reich for going 75 miles an hours. It cost me $161, and I pouted about it for about a month. But it does slow me down and this may save me from an accident. Over the years I have developed an appreciation for law enforcement officers and the tough job they do.

The term law enforcement covers a lot of different specialties such as Sheriff Deputies, Police Dispatchers, Highway Patrol Officers, OSBI Agents, Drug Enforcement and Task Force Officers, SWAT Officers, US Marshals, Border Patrol Agents, FBI Agents, Detectives, Investigators, Military Police, plus many more.

I read the local news papers and see that local law enforcement officers have intervened in domestic violence incidents, arrested a DUI driver, arrested a drug dealer, found another body, helped get a mentally ill person to a hospital, worked bad accidents, mediated neighbor and family disputes, and/or help eliminate another drug lab. All of these people do a job that I could not do. The first time someone spit on me I would probably “Cap him in the kneecap”.

Many people do not realize that there are lot of disadvantages to being in law enforcement such as low pay; long and odd hours of work: work in all types of weather (worse weather usually mean more accidents and more weather exposure); exposure to medical dangers from suspects such as AIDS, hepatitis, pneumonia, etc.; occupational incidents involving children, death, and violence; criticism after the incident; legal issues caused by the use of lethal force; risk in pursuit of a fleeing suspects; incidents involving hard core criminal arrests; and not least of all carrying an uncomfortable 10+ pounds of police hardware, weapon, vest, and ammunition.

Because Idabel Police, Broken Bow Police, Valliant Police, and County Sheriff Deputies are all on random drug testing, I get to talk to the officers when they come in for testing. One of my questions is “Why are you in law enforcement?” The most common response is “I like to help people”. Other responses are “I’m not stuck in an office all day”, “ I make the community a little safer”, “I never can predict what is going to happen on my shift”, and “ I like the excitement of the job”.

In addition, law enforcement provides a reassuring presence in the community. Try to imagine what our lives would be like without law enforcement!

For more articles from Ross go to http://rchandler.blogspot.com/

Why Men Can Not Win Arguments With Women

By Ross Chandler

Arguments in relationships are unavoidable. You are not a clone one of the other. There are many differences psychologically, biologically, and environmentally between the sexes. Different points of view are supposed to be healthy in the long view. The problem is most disagreements are about issues in the immediate past or projected as a problem in the immediate future. Over the years I have come to following observations: (Note: I do not presume to know how women think!)

ü Men must sometime choose between being “Right” and peace and quiet. If you get hit in the pedestrian cross walk by a bus, being right and not getting out of the way is being stupid.

ü On the petty stuff keep it low-key, or just let it go. Take the garbage out, turn down the air conditioner, tell her its ok to get another cat, get a haircut, etc.

ü There is no quick argument. You are committed from 20+ minutes to infinity. Arguing time is time the man is not watching a favorite sport or engaging in a favorite hobby.

ü Men will lose most (or all) of any arguments about emotional issues. Women can spring frustrating issues out of nowhere. The best tact is to ask, “How can I help” or “What do you want me to do”. Then shut up and listen!

ü Some hot issues brought up by women are to learn more (pro or con) about the subject. She argues the other side but is gathering information from the man about the subject.

ü Sometimes women bring forth a tirade because of emotional issues men will never understand. The best male response may be a non-verbal position of listening with sincere emphaty. Women sometime talk through their issues all by themselves.

ü Some arguments sink into a black hole without either of you knowing how you got there.

ü Really bad arguments can also expand into civil war with families and against families.

Another observation is that, “Women not only can use illogical examples, they actually work for them.”

Example 1: After 45 minutes of arguing and he thinks he is winning. She says, “You just argue better than I do!” Forget any logical response to this one. The man loses if he takes the bait and tries to argue she does or she doesn’t.

Example 2: Sometimes this is a festering argument just waiting to be activated again when you get home. She quotes what you said Saturday, three weeks ago, in junior high, or whatever. You deny saying it, but she can prove your memory is poor because you can’t remember saying it! Forget trying to argue your way out of this logically.

Example 3: You think you have developed a new brilliant strategy on the next argument on a petty subject. Twenty minutes into the argument you switch side and say, “I agree with you”. However, she stays mad because you did not agree sooner or you are just being condescending.

Example 4: After 45 minutes of non-stop verbal warfare. She says her piece and ends up with "Let's stop arguing please." You think this is a truce, timeout, or compromise and readily agree. However, she has won because she got the last word in!

The hard part is finding the middle ground and diffusing the hurt feelings. I recommend compromise, truce, or timeout whenever possible. Got a dinner at her mother’s house this weekend? Fine. Next weekend the two of you are going fishing. Compromise is fine, but men must make sure they are giving as much as they are getting.

Arguing is not all bad. Arguing also sparks up the relationship and can lead to a better understanding about issues. If nothing else the man (or women) learns never to bring that up again! Women want a man to respectfully stand his ground on issues; agreeing with her on most issues can also cause problems in the relationship. Finally, men will learn (sooner or later) there is no winner in an argument with a female.

Why Drug Test?

By Ross Chandler

Regardless of the arguments for or against drug testing, it continues to expand throughout the U.S. to include even small county and city governments, hospitals, nursing homes, and family owned businesses. Most large businesses and industry have had drug testing for over 15 years, and in the past 5 years, most small construction companies require drug testing. In addition, most federal and many state agencies require drug testing.
Many times I have been asked the question, “Why drug test?” from agency directors, superintendents, mayors, and owners of small businesses. All of these people are looking for a simple, twenty-five words or less conclusive answer to what appears to be a simple question. However, I have never been able to give simple, concise, fits everyone answers.
Following are a list of 14 answers that may be helpful for most people asking the “Why” question:
1. To comply with mandatory federal regulations (i.e.: Department of Transportation).
2. To comply with sub-contractor requirements (i.e.: Weyerhaeuser Company).
3. To comply with customer or contract requirements.
4. To comply with insurance or workman compensation requirements.
5. To match similar agency, government, or business norms (i.e.: law officers, fire fighters, emergency medical personnel, crane operators, and forklift drivers).
6. To reinforce the agency or business position of “Drug-free” or “No use workplace” (i.e.: Wal-Mart and McDonalds).
7. To motivate people with drug problems to get off drugs to get or keep a job.
8. To establish strict policies of discipline or firing concerning alcohol or drug use and an accident/incident at work.
9. To convince “casual users” that the cost of using might be too high (i.e.: loss of job and documented evidence of drug use).
10. To reduce the costs of alcohol or drug use in the workplace (i.e.: health, theft, employee turnover, accidents/incidents).
11. To give recovering employees motivation to not use (relapse prevention).
12. To improve the agency or business image in the eye of the customers or potential customers (i.e.: indicated by posters that say, “This is a Drug-Free Workplace” or “Drug Testing is Required to Work Here”).
13. To keep alcohol and or drug use away from company or school functions.
14. To avoid being sued. Without an enforced alcohol/drug abuse policy, employers can be held negligent for damage to property or harm done to others by employees under the influence of alcohol or drugs (i.e.: driving the company vehicle, forklift drivers, and other heavy equipment operators).

For more information about alcohol and drug testing call 580-286-6577.

The Hole

By Ross Chandler

Living or being around an alcohol abuser can be very frustrating at times. Unfortunately, what appears to be a very simple answer to problems related to alcohol (i.e.: “QUIT DRINKING’) is very difficult to implement because of the defense mechanisms (irrational reasons) to continue to drink regardless of the consequences. To help understand the irrational reasoning side of alcohol use, let us imagine a typical hometown guy called Joe. He has a good job, hunts, fishes, and goes to church (occasionally). However, Joe has a 20’ wide (12’ deep) hole in his front yard.

One night as he comes home after stopping off at his favorite bar, he falls in the hole and breaks his right arm. The next day he sits on his front porch with his arm in a cast and decides to put up a street light near the edge of the hole so he can see better at night.

Four nights later he comes home during a thunderstorm (the light over the hole is out), slides off in the hole and breaks the other arm. The next day he sits on his front porch with both arms in cast and decides to have someone put a sidewalk with a six-inch curb around the hole.

Two weeks later the designated driver drives him home and he trips over the curb, falls in the hole and breaks his right leg. The next day he sits on his front porch with two arms and one leg in casts and decides to call a fence company and find out how much a fence around the hole would cost.

Of course this story could go on ad-infinitum, and any 6-year old kid would suggest, “Fill up the hole!” However, Joe is in denial that the hole is the problem. He sincerely (& irrationally) believes he is someone who can handle a front yard hole regardless of the evidence to the contrary. This is similar to the way an alcohol abuser develops a convenient list of justification about their drinking. After all, he or she has only had a run of bad luck (for 12+ years).

Most alcohol abusers will become alcoholic if they live long enough. The over-simplified difference between the abuser and the alcoholic is the alcoholic loses the choice to not drink alcohol; whereas the alcohol abuser still has some choice in when, where, what, and with whom they drink (or not to drink on that occasion). However, when the consequences of drinking become sever for either the alcohol abuser or the alcoholic, life can become a booze form of Russian roulette.

Your local alcohol abuse treatment agency is the Kiamichi Council on Alcoholism and Other Drug Abuse, 580-286-3301.

Almost Last Diet

By Ross Chandler

I am considering a new diet program for people with good intentions. Studies show that overweight people try at least 7 different diets in their lifetime with little success. So why not concentrate on marketing to at least six unsuccessful diets so people can at least feel better when they are trying to lose weight.
How does the following sound?
Our scales only read in inches; i.e. I am 11 inches short (Can’t do much about my height!)
Membership fee is $1,000 per year, but you do not have to show up for any meetings or workouts.
Our weight loss foods include: “Slim Slow,” “Just a little energy bar”, and a diet aid capsule for men that is a combination of Viagra, Vitamin B-12, and “No Dose.”
We also have accessory items: Boomerang belts, self-tying shoestrings, slim image mirrors, and super stretch underwear.
We also have our own 12-step program. The first step is the understanding we may be powerless over our weight but don’t want a lot of help with it.
We also market a perfume called “Heavy Impression” for people who want to smell better than they look.
We even have a “Job Search Program” for our members and have the following positions open:
o Furniture tester for Log Cabin Furniture.
o Skin sensitivity experiments for sun burn, fire ants, and snake bite.
o Sparing partner for a Sumo Wrestler.
o Live fire target tow for the Abrams Tank Training Center.
o Elevator tester for Magnum High Rise Construction Company.
o Bouncer for Momma’s Bar & Bordello in Medulla, Colombia
We also are addressing certain legal issues such as:
o Handicapped Parking Permit for anyone 12” or more short.
o No stairs over 7 steps.
We also give a chocolate colored 30 day chip with a bite out of it for those members that tough it out through the first 30 days.
Finally, we issue a membership and identity card with your high school graduation picture on it and encourage everyone to check the Box “Early Organ Donor.” You then become a participant in the nationwide “Save Someone Else’s Life Program.” In case of an accident, “You will only be asked once if you’re okay.”